Dear Little Black Girl,

It took me awhile to sit here and write this post. I do my best thinking at night. I’ve been through sooooooooo many things in my life for me to only be 20. But I’m appreciative of the mistakes, trials, and tribulations that come with being a young black female. See, I grew up in a middle class home. We were comfortable. We had money in the bank, and the bills were paid. Now, don’t you go judging me. I’m not all high and mighty. I’ve been through “the struggle”. There have been times that the lights or water were off but that never lasted long. I had a family to support me no matter what. You would think that my life would be easy with bumps and bruises here and there. Unfortunately, that’s not the case. See my mom always told me “Jazmin, no matter what you do, how you do it, or when you do it. You’re going to have to do it twice as well, and work twice as hard.” I never knew what she meant. I let her words float to the back of my head.

As a young woman today. I now know what she meant.

Do me a favor, before you continue reading this post, look down at your arms or legs or whatever limbs you have. What do you see? Do you see two arms? Do you see two hands with 5 fingers on each? If not dial 911! Haha. Do you see two legs and two feet with 5 toes on each? Okay. There’s one thing that differs you from the next person. Its your skin. Not just your skin. It’s the pigment of your skin. Do me this one last favor, look down and tell me the color of your skin? What’s your race? Heritage? Background? Ethnicity?

 

You see I’m a product of African American descent. No, I am not black. I am brown. Smooth and creamy mahogany brown. I have the slight- deep dark rose cheeks with a gold undertone. I have silky jet black hair that will mesmerize you ever time I turn my head. My dark brown eyes will melt your heart. My lips do wonders while whispering sweet nothings in your ear.

 

But.. None of that matters. Why? You know why! Don’t act brand new!! I’m black can’t you see. No matter how hard I work, no matter what I do I’ll always be this way. My mind may very well be intelligent but that wont change my skin. I don’t have a problem being African American. I honestly don’t. It’s the working twice as hard as the next person just to get half way there. All of my life I’ve had to work twice as hard; in the classrooms, jobs, internships, leadership positions, etc. The list can go on and on for days but I wont keep you here that long.

I’m now coming to terms that I am who I am and there’s not a thing I can do about it. I do get tired. I do. But I still fight. I still work. I’m still me. When a job is passed to another person of lesser quality because of my color. I don’t get upset. I try again. And I try even harder the next time. I polish and finesse my skill set and give it another go. This is what you should do. So take notes here (little black girl).

It doesn’t bother me that racism is still very well alive in today’s society. Nor should it bother you.

 

 

I am battered and offended when I am done wrong by another person of color. It’s not the opposing race that will break your heart. Its the people that share the same background as you. Can you believe it? Your own people hurting you. Brothers, Sisters, Cousins, Nephews, Friends. I am you. You are me. We.

How can a people that have been through a tremendous amount of suffering still find it in themselves to condemn their own people? This question is still unanswered.

 

 

And this is what hurts me the most.

 

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Your move… I think.

It’s the age old conundrum. Who makes the first move? Who asks who out? Who will win this war? If we keep playing this back and forth game. We’ll all end up single. The only good thing about that is all the cats and dogs from the shelters will no longer be homeless! I mean that’s a plus, right? I mean who wouldn’t want clawed furniture and poop scattered everywhere? That’s better than a human companion any day! Right…? NO, WRONG!

Personally I’m tired of this back and forth. Even the Dutch said fuck it and made the first move! Why can’t the girl make the first move? Who says guys have to always ask the girl out first? Why can’t we step up? HUH? I hear nothing but crickets.
Yep! You’ve got no response. Is it because it’s out of your comfort zone? You’re not use to making the first step? It could resort to rejection and utter denial of any chance that he has the same feelings for you? Could that be it? But why would anyone want to sit and continuously rack their brains over if another person likes you or feels the same way? Why not just ask. Just say, “Hey you. Yeah, you with the hair and face. I like you. I want you. We’re dating. Now buy me a drink. Please?” You’re probably laughing at that but honestly why not? Why hold back your feelings for someone. If you like them then SAY IT!!! There’s no reason that you should sit back and literally go bat shit crazy when you could solve all of your problems with that one interaction!

I know I might seem insensitive. I too have sat back for 4 years straight and watched a guy I like walk right out of my life. I mean I obsessed over him. I knew his shoe size, his ID number, his favorite food and color, where he lived, his license plate, where he liked to hang out… Wait. maybe it’s a good thing he’s gone considering I literally stalked him. And you know what came of that situation? NOTHING. He never knew I existed and still doesn’t til this day. All my hard work and efforts I poured into studying him like he was my Final Examination, went no where. My point is, be the bigger person, make the first move, take the initiative, be the ONE. Don’t let your feelings eat you alive and before you know it, that special someone is walking out of your life and they never knew your name or the fact that you exist. So take the first step. TELL THEM. Don’t be me. SPEAK your mind. Do it for the people that can’t. (hint hint ME!!!)

 

Tell me what you think. How do you feel? Have you made the first move yet? Will you? Are you shy like me?

Well TELL ME! As always, comment below!

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I’ve got the runs…

Congratulations! You’ve decided that getting back into shape will get rid of those loveable love handles. You put on your old loose t-shirt you found in the bottom back of your drawers. Those new jogging pants you keep in the back of your closet are going to look even better once you actually begin to jog. You find some socks that may or may not match, depending on if you squint really hard with the lights off. After sliding your socks on you pull out those running shoes that haven’t been worn since the last time your went running. Your head band is snug and your phone is programmed to rock out. This is it! The big moment! You’re ready. You’re about to do it. You’re going to hit the ground running. (Pun intended)

Now you’re running. You’ve left your home street. Your house is nowhere insight. You’re actually doing it! Who would’ve thought you’d be running? Well now your on the go and you’re body feels different. Maybe it’s the lungs and heart hard at work? Or could it be your jiggling thighs movin’ and grovin’ with every step? Now your stomachs starting to do a little dancing of its own. But wait that can’t be right. The stomach? Yes. Every step of your feet hitting the ground time after time causes your bowles to get movin of ya know what I’m sayin! In other words, this repetitive motion of course causes your gastrointestinal system tract is looseness and forced out of your body. All of a sudden your looking for the nearest bathroom. Sadly your far from home now. Not a port-a-potty in sight. You’re speed starts to decrease and before you know it your walking around with your hands covering your backside hoping nothing slips out.

 

Yeah, that scenario was me today. I decided I would get back into shape. I started off walking and jogging around my neighborhood. Well, fortunately I made it home in time. Luckily I wasn’t to far from home. For some odd reason walking/running makes you poop! Yes, it makes you poop!! Yeah I said poop. Maybe you didn’t read it properly… POOP!!

My advice to anyone out there who is trying to get back in shape… Run, you’ll be shedding pounds on the inside… and out.

 

Tell me about your experiences! Has this happened to you? Do you exercise? What would you have done in this situation? Let me know! I’m game for any suggestions. As always comment below, I look forward to reading and laughing along with you.

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Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion pt.3

On this episode of the Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion the Final portion, drama continues to flourish and wreak havoc upon these women.

Now Hunny I was very excited for this two hour long episode. Phaedra finally tells Kenya how it is, how it should’ve been, and how it will be in the future. Phaedra got Kenya together real quick. I personally believe Kenya needed this. Kenya has been provoking Phaedra and Apollo for 2yrs now. 2!!!! Not 1 but 2 years has this nonsense about Kenya texting and being inappropriate with Phaedra’s husband Apollo. Now I am not putting all the blame on Kenya because Apollo knows good and well that he DOES NOT need to be interacting with Kenya AT ALL! Ooooo and let’s not forget the part where Nene told Kenya she is the LOWEST paid sitting on the stage acting a fool. SMH. Child, let me tell you!!! It’s about time that somebody put her in her place.

In my honest opinion Kenya needs to be kicked off the show. Honestly shall we start with the obvious? The show is called Real House WIVES of Atlanta. Kenya is single like a dollar bill Hunny. She is just as single as me. She has NO ONE. ABSOLUTELY NO ONE. We’ve witnessed Kenya and Walter and their fake arrangement now Kenya is chasing after Apollo and Phaedra won’t have it!!

Kenya is the drama starter and I fear the only reason that she is still here is because she brings drama and drama bring ratings.

This show is a reality show but it is very rare to find a show with an all female (African American) cast to actually watch and look up too. Me being a woman of color this is one of the shows I will definitely watch and make sure I see EVERY episode. It is disappointing to see grown black women bickering with one another. We don’t need to be tearing each other down. We should instead be uplifting and encouraging one another. I do look forward to this show airing for another season hopefully Kenya will have changed or will be off the show completely.

 

 

 

I’ve voiced my opinion, it’s your turn! Tell me what you think and who you think should stay and go!

 

Ipsy

This is my open and honest review of Ipsy.com

Description: “Each month, subscribers will receive a beautiful Glam Bag with deluxe samples and full-sized beauty products. Members can watch and play along with the stylists with the same products that they are using. All for only $10 a month.” -Ipsy.com

 

http://www.ipsy.com

 

In this review I will discuss my opinions about Ipsy.com, pros, cons. etc.

 

I found out about Ipsy through a friend who has been a subscriber for over a year. After doing my research and reading other reviews about Ipsy I decided to join.  It takes about 1-2 weeks after payment for you to receive your Ipsy package. Ipsy makeup samples come in small makeup bags. There are about 5 items inside of the makeup bag ranging from, small toilette wipe samples, sample facial creams, eyeliners,  lipsticks, mascara, primers, etc.

Pros:

Packages do not take long to arrive.

Makeup bags are cute and small enough to tote in side of purses.

Easy to access website and account information.

Website offers tips and tricks videos and forums to answer any questions/concerns.

Products are name brand and are great quality.

 

Cons:

With Ipsy broad range of beauty products there is no clear way to know exactly what you’re going to receive.

Samples are extremely small but advertised as full length products on website.

After paying $10.00/month every month I would expect to have full size products.

Not all make up samples sent are neutral for every skin tone (I’m a woman of color).

 

I enjoy my monthly Ipsy subscription although I feel short handed I so like to keep up with what’s hot and what’s not. Ipsy is a great way to mingle with other beauty gurus.

Again, my name is Jazmin Humphrey and this is my open honest opinion of Ipsy.

 

Thank  You.

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Real Housewives of Atlanta

If you haven’t seen the Porsha Stewart and Kenya Moore fight on the first installment of the Housewives of Atlanta Reunion, you need to get with the times! Now, I am not one for violence but this fight had me on the edge of my seat. The clip of the fight can be found on YouTube and various other websites. So let’s get down to business. Kenya Moore is known from her previous reunion to bring props and get under your skin. This year she decided to bring a “Queens scepter” and bullhorn. Throughout the reunion she is seen pointing the scepter in Porsha’s face and invading not only Porsha’s space but Cynthia’s personal space. Kenya also decides to over talk Porsha with a bullhorn and not only is she screaming in Porsha’s ear, she is screaming in Cynthia’s ear. We all know what happens next. Porsha snatches the scepter from Kenya then throws it to the ground. A few moments later Porsha is seen standing face to face with Kenya and they are hair pulling! Excuse me, “fighting”!! Haha Of course Kenya being who she is decides to call the cops and report the incident and Porsha is last seen lying on the floor with her fellow cast mates surrounding her; except for Cynthia, she is checking on Kenya. Porsha is soon asked to leave the venue and return at a later date. Many questions and debates arose. #TeamPorsha and #TeamKenya have been trending on Twitter and various other social networks. I personally am on no ones side. I do feel bad for Porsha. Kenya has provoked her throughout the season and now the reunion. Porsha has recently been divorced and just finished a stage play. She is trying to get her business off the ground and the emotional toll that followed her to the reunion spelled disaster. I blame the producers and Andy Cohen. Andy is very familiar with all of the ladies. He even hosts a Watch What Happens Live 30min segment after the show is aired with one of the housewives. So if he knows what provokes them and what makes them tick, why ask them certain questions? Why didn’t he stop the fight when it escalated? What were the producers doing? My guess is they are sitting on the sidelines thinking to themselves RATINGS!!! It is sad that a show meant to uplift and inspire the African American (female) community is now being appraised because of fights and arguments. Now don’t get me wrong I love a good argument here and there. BUT THIS IS TO FAR! I think Porsha should get to keep her job and Kenya needs to tone it all the way down. The producers need to do a much better job.

 

 

Now my question to you is, what do you think?

 

Are you #TeamPorsha or #TeamKenya

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WHERE ARE ALL THE GOOD MEN/WOMEN???

“SMILE… it will make you look better. PRAY… it will keep you strong. LOVE… it will help you enjoy life a little more”
-Unknown

 

Imagine yourself out for lunch with your girls in a nice restaurant and a group of good looking eligible bachelors passed by. You and your girlfriends gave each other the “He can get it look”. Oddly enough the men waltzed right by your table to a booth that seated their companions. We then turned to one another and said “bottoms up”!

Yes, this “scene” was very real for me not too long ago.

I recently found myself complaining to my girlfriends about relationships and the quality of men. We discussed ever scenario of every average couple and we still couldn’t understand why we were single.  What did those women have that we didn’t have? I mean the average woman is strong, independent, intelligent, working, and beautiful. Is it too much to ask to want a man that is equal or more? Should one settle into a relationship? What about the average man? They’re typically handsome/attractive, intelligent, employed, independent. Should men settle? Do men expect to much from women? or vise versa?! Our conversation sparked much laughter and “toasting”. We never got a definite answer to any of our questions, and now I would like to know what you think.

 

Why are so many men single?

Why are so many women so single?

Are standards set a bit too high for the opposite sex?

Are there any good men left?

Are there any good women left?

What do you think?

 

 

-Jazmin AAyana